San Diego Momma ...but it could happen anywhere...

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I'm a kid who never thought she'd be married or a mom.
Now I'm both.
And that's just fine with me.

 

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April 20, 1941 - November 10, 1997

April 20th, 2008

youngmom.jpg

 

This Sunday’s Playlist is dedicated to my mom, Angela, who would have been 67 today. (Please note that if you do follow that link above, I included it in the interest of full disclosure. I wasn’t all light and rainbows when it came to my mom. In fact, after she died, I was still angry at her — angry that she succumbed, that she wasn’t stronger, that she didn’t rail against death; scream and fight to live. That’s when I wrote the poem. And I feel bad about it, but it memorializes my experience of her death, and I need it to exist.)

 

Anyway. About the playlist:
her favorite song was “Amazing Grace,” and I think of her whenever I hear it, so it had to be here.

 

The Indigo Girl’s “Power of Two” is included on this playlist because I once told my mom that I’d dedicate it to my Dad at his funeral, and I remember her pause, as if perhaps hurt that our relationship didn’t inspire such song dedications. I never dreamed that a year later, I’d be attending her funeral.

 

Elton John’s “Sorry Seems to Be The Hardest Word,” was our theme song. I’d play it after many an argument, and it always reminds me of us.

 

Finally, at my wedding, I played Enya’s “On My Way Home,” and I include its lyrics here to mark her birthday.

 

I have been given

one moment from heaven

as I am walking

surrounded by night,

Stars high above me

make a wish under moonlight.

 

On my way home

I remember

only good days.

On my way home

I remember

only best days.

On my way home

I can remember every new day.

 

I move in silence

with each step taken,

snow falling round me

like angels in flight,

Far in the distance

is my wish under moonlight.

 

On my way home

I remember

only good days

On my way home

I remember all

the best days

And on my way

home I can remember

every new day.

 

On my way Home

I remember all the good days

 

PLAYLIST FOR ANGELA

 

On My Way Home/Enya

Language or the Kiss/Indigo Girls

Amazing Grace/Mahalia Jackson

Accidentally Like a Martyr/Warren Zevon

No Blue Sky/Thorns

Sail Away/David Gray

Do You Realize?/Flaming Lips

For A Dancer/Jackson Browne

Far Away/Nickelback

Rowing Song/Patty Griffin

Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word/Elton John

Power of Two/Indigo Girls

 

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On April 20th, 2008, Cheri said:

Hugs and kisses to you.

My mom’s birthday is/was (don’t know if she’s dead or alive) April 14, 1941. Hmmmm.

On April 20th, 2008, Jenn @ Juggling Life said:

The anniversary of my mom’s death is coming up. She was 61 when she died. Like yours, it was a complicated relationship.

I wish I knew music well enough to do such a great playlist.

On April 21st, 2008, Kendra said:

Once again I am reminded to try to patch it up with my mom.
The picture of your mom is beautiful, and her birthday dedication post was wonderful and thoughtful.

On April 21st, 2008, Cascia @ Healthy Moms said:

Such a wonderful tribute to your mom! By the way, tag your it.

On April 21st, 2008, matteroffactmommy said:

this is fantastic. thank you for opening yourself up like this. i sincerely appreciate it…

i like the dimple in her chin! ;)

On April 21st, 2008, Jamie said:

Love your honesty here. As Jenn said, it is a complicated relationship, that of mother-daughter. We navigate now as both…

Beautiful song choices.

On April 21st, 2008, mommypie said:

This is beautiful Deb. And she’s beautiful. There’s no mistaking you’re her daughter — the two of you look SO alike!

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