Disney Tips for the Serious-Minded

As a blogger you all look up to for travel tips and theme park reviews, I thought I’d take this time to outline a few “Do’s and Don’ts” for Disneyland.


Also, since I visited both California Adventure and Disneyland last weekend, I feel I am eminently qualified to offer my opinions on how you should tour the parks.


For instance,


1. DO book a hotel room overlooking the park. Your kids’ lingering, longing looks over the balcony rail will allow you precious time to gird your loins for the inevitable, prodigious, (and stereophonic) “CAN WE GO THERE NOWs?” that soon follow.




2. DO dress your child, and your husband’s legs, appropriately.




3. DO keep a watchful eye on your family from the hotel gift shop. DO bid them a warm farewell before you hunker down in front of the princess paraphernalia and finally buy those crystal slippers you never got for Christmas.




4. DO what is necessary to ensure your child does not run off in the park.




5. DO make sure your child starts the day with a nutritious meal




6. DO ask Disney to turn on the full moon for added Halloween ambiance.




7. DO go to Mickey’s Trick or Treat Party. It really gets you in the mood, if you know what I mean.


I don’t know why I said that.




8. DON’T hide behind a tree and pretend to leave the kids as a Halloween joke. They won’t get it.




9. DO encourage your kids to make new friends. Preferably ones with a broom and a flying license. That way you don’t have to chauffeur them around as much.




10. DON’T let your kids read those magical Disney books. They get sucked into the pages that come alive and you have a real hard time finding them again.




11. DO bring warm outerwear if you plan to visit the parks in the evening.




12. DO listen when your five-year-old tells you she doesn’t want to go on Space Mountain.




13. DON’T believe her when she “changes her mind” and gives you a fake smile to underscore her “sincerity.”




14. DO take her on It’s A Small World afterwards to erase the Space Mountain experience from her mind forever.


15. DO what it says here. You know, if some guy weren’t blocking the “C.” (Hey! That’s a life metaphor!)


I don’t know why I said that.




16. And above all, DO wear supportive undergarments.


Disney sent my family and I to Mickey’s Trick or Treat Party last weekend and also to Disneyland the next day. I bet they just love how I incorporated my chest into the overview.


19 Responses to “Disney Tips for the Serious-Minded”

  1. Whatnowdad says:

    Great post. We are taking our two girls to Disneyland in December. It will be our 3rd trip in 5 years. You could say we LOVE the magic kingdom! Your tips are perfect. I would add 11) Know when you’ve hit your “fun” limit to avoid meltdowns. Even the happiest place on earth can’t help the over tired child!

  2. I actually noticed the choke hold Toots has on her sister before I noticed your chest.

  3. Ha! I noticed the choke hold, too! Not to say that’s not an impressive rack, lady…


    This was a great post, and it looked like it was fantastic. Your warning about the parts of the book that come to life is spot on!

  4. Myra says:

    Such wonderful photos! Love your vacation memories – and you look fabulous dahling!

  5. Theresa says:

    You are a riot!!!!!!!!!! Too true!!!!!

    Come see me and experience Tokyo Disney and the only Disney Sea in the world.

    I seriously teared up looking at the pictures of you and your family. Can you believe we are mommies????? I am so happy for you! Your blog is a blessing to me every day. I love you!!!

  6. Your girls are so not-babies anymore. When did that take place?!

  7. Jennifer says:

    I love Disneyland! I can’t wait to take my kids. I’ve just got to be patient for a few more years. I need to save up and definatly make sure that it’s a trip they’ll be old enough to remember.

  8. stoneskin says:

    I laughed at (8). Adult humour is often wasted on kids. Supportive undergarments? Are you including men in that statement?

  9. Tiara says:

    Love your website! Found it through pocoyayo. Your kids are beautiful and I will be taking these tips for my family’s first trip to Disney.

  10. Judy says:

    Don’t worry about the space mountain scars. I was 8 the first time we went to DL and also told my parents that I wanted to go in the Haunted House – then freaked out in the beginning as the walls started closing in on us. He had to force me through the rest of the ride since we had just waited an hour in line (the days before fast pass). I got over it though sometimes still look for ghosts in the mirror…

  11. My husband and son went on a boys’ trip to Disney World when the little one was just 3. On the balcony overlooking the park (you are SO right about that!), shooting faux bullets from his new carved wooden rifle, he turned to his cigar puffing father and asked, “Dad, do you think anyone anywhere is having more fun than we are right now?”

  12. g says:

    When my son was about seven we took him to Disneyland for the first time…I was prepared to hate it, but pretend to enjoy it for his sake. TO my surprise, I absolutely loved it!!! Your pictures are great.

  13. Barrie Summy says:

    I now refuse to go on It’s a Small World because I can’t get the song out of my head for weeks after! Great post!!!

  14. Fun Disney Tips. Looking forward to a big kid Disney adventure with my oldest… Just have to find someone to watch the little ones!

  15. I love Disneyland so very much.

    My favorite parts of your trip: Asking Disney to turn on the full moon (I had no idea the extent of their power) and the brilliant half-nelson big sis executed there. :D

  16. vodkamom says:

    That looks fantastic!!!!!!!

    I love it.

  17. bejewell says:

    Supportive underwear or not, you look fabulous, and have a gorgeous, gorgeous family!!!

  18. Looks like a magical time:) That halloween party, my kids still talk about going last year and what a fine time they had.

  19. SeaBird says:

    Ahhhh… vicariously experiencing YOUR family trip to Disney is much more amusing than actually having to go ourselves. My husband is truing to convince me it would be fun. I seriosly doubt it.

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