Banner Day

One day last June, I wrote a post about things I like. Kind of like Oprah, but with way less mass appeal and melanin.


In particular, I liked this necklace:



And I threatened to pretty much dismember anybody who bought it (“now you have no neck! mwah ha ha! how you gonna wear that necklace without a neck? you neckless necklace stealer! and Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers!”) (you’re all ignoring me, right?) because I’ve been window shopping it for almost a year. A year! So it made total sense that I would post its unrivaled golden beauty for all to covet on my public site.


But when I recently went to jewelry designer Kelly Meeker’s site and saw this:



(it says SOLD OUT)


…vindictive rage swept over me and I began to deploy my “destroy person who bought MY necklace” plan.


And right when I got to the part where I’d put saran wrap over all their toilets, I received and opened this:


Box of Love


And then I did this:


Oh Happy Day


And a smidgeon of this:


Yes, a Happy Day


I even got a passerby compliment ALREADY and I’ve only owned this necklace for two hours.


I KNEW it would change my life.


My good friend Ellen sent this to me as a thank-you for her recent visit, for which she’d already given me gifts and sent appreciation cards, a photo CD and warm regards.


And so thank you Ellen, for being my friend for more than 24 years, for letting me stretch your size 6 jelly shoes over my size 8 feet at that one basketball game, for letting me pick out the rugby you wore on your first date with John Quinn, for introducing me to Frito Lay’s Chili Cheese chips, and for not ditching me altogether after I talked Brad Hartman into driving us home the night he jumped the median and nearly killed us all.


I’m glad we lived long enough for you to send me this necklace.


But most of all, thanks for your thoughtfulness, and for being the kind of person who remembers birthdays and anniversaries, even for people like me who always forget, and for always thinking of making others happy (even when they don’t deserve it).


16 thoughts on “Banner Day

  1. It is absolutely gorgeous. And you are absolutely gorgeous, you hag. I mean that in the absolute nicest way possible, which is to say I mean it in that “I love you so much that I cannot hate you even though you’re skinny and pretty, so I’ll call you a ‘hag'” way.

  2. Oh. It is a fabulous necklace and you look fabulous in it.

    Now can we talk about the Chili Cheese Fritos? OMG. I forgot about those. I want some right now. Do you think Brad Hartman is available to come pick me up and drive me over the median to 7-ll so I can buy some?

  3. The necklace is gorgeous – and it looks great on you! What a sweet friend… one who really took the time to get you something she knew you’d adore!

    Here’s to good friends…

  4. You look real purdy. Does Ellen have any plans to visit Australia? If so, we have a spare room. Actually, it’s a play room, but I’m prepared to put the beloved child’s toys (or the child’s beloved toys) in storage for the duration if that’s what it takes. Let her know. :)

  5. So funny how things work out! I’m telling you, when your friend bought this necklace (before I realized it was a gift for you!), I was really concerned since it was and will be the only one!

    It looks amazing on you and I am SO glad that you own it!

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