BlogHer: A Musing

It was Friday when I lost my mind.

I couldn’t keep up, plain couldn’t keep up with the faces, the cameras, the tweeting, the shucking, the jiving, the talking, the branding, the sponsoring, the expo-ing, the walking, the waiting, the schlepping, the nodding.

I misplaced the ability to speak in complete sentences. To move. To do anything other than vastly and completely feel the experience. Just let it wash over me.

So I did.

I have this thing. When I’m in the midst of a moment, it’s hard for me to freeze it. To make it stop and capture the laugh, the cry, the talk…with a photograph, or a word. Because, it’s a moment, right? You want to be IN it, not outside of it…broadcasting how you feel…when you could you know, just feel it.

I suppose that’s a blogger fail because I don’t have photos and summaries to nutshell this past weekend.

But I felt it all. Every moment.

Sure some are fuzzed over with late nights and robust drinks and bright lights, big city, but what a beautiful mosaic.

And although I’m philosophizing now…(oh sweet exhaustion how you rob me of my vocabulary)…there are so many hard and fast details to share. Central Park walks with a lovely friend. 2AM in the hotel bar. A humor panel that kicked the weekend’s ass. But so much of the time I moved in an alternate universe where my “fake” life was the “real” one and how hard it can be to flip flop the two when you’re home with your husband and children and life…your blood, sweat and tears existence. Your 3D in technicolor reality. The one that exists without the tweets and the posts and the status updates.

That’s where I am now.

So? More later.