This Post is Made With Real Poo

As I may have mentioned, I was recently invited to the San Diego Zoo (thanks, Mel) to preview the new Elephant Odyssey exhibit, and as I also may or may not have mentioned, I don’t know yet how to incorporate “PR” content into my blog, so as I am wont to do, I wondered agonizingly how to write about my trip to the zoo (DISCLAIMER: which was free, with cocktails, and a party, and food, and friends, and also agog with kids, including my own, that I lost parental sight of on a regular basis, thank God for my husband, for whom I am working on creating a name for that means “Blog Husband” (Blogby? Husbog?) because he watches stuff like my kids while I am off doing important bloggy things such as drinking wine with Sugar) while not sacrificing my “editorial” integrity (those quotes should probably instead be around “integrity”).)


Yes. That was all one sentence.


Well. As I was hemming and hawing and doing what I do, the perfect answer dropped into my lap. It just plopped right down in my face, so obvious, so BIG, I could not ignore it. I mean, my epiphany was so large, I could almost smell it.


Poo Frame


Poo Tag


Of course! As anyone knows, poo is the way to my heart. I love saying it, contemplating its many virtues, and randomly injecting it into conversation. “Poo.” It’s so perfectly immature. And that’s when I knew. If the San Diego Zoo gives out swag frames made out of real poo, I could not not write about my visit. (I do not accept all poo offers, like when The Rock called me into the bathroom last week, saying “You have GOT TO see this!”) (So if you have a legitimate poo product for consideration, please email me before sending samples.)




Making paper.


In all seriousity (thanks to MOFM for the new word), the Elephant Odyssey won me over. All 7.5 acres, $45 million, four-years-in-the-making parts of it. Also, despite my love for poo, I’m a respectable history and factoid girl, so I loved that the exhibit focused on animals that roamed Southern California 12,000 years ago and shows their living relatives today, including a herd of elephants. Also, there are life-size statues of extinct animals that used to live in the area, although The Rock and I arguscussed the fact that this tiger is life-size. My awesome point? This is a world class zoo, they’re not going to depict something factually inaccurate, dumb head (I love you, Hublog!).


Big Tiger


A prehistoric tiger. One of the many reasons I’m glad I wasn’t a cavewoman. (Most of these pictures were taken and provided to me by Tonya. The red-headed moppet is her daughter.)


In addition, did you know that elephants grow six sets of molars and when a set wears down from grinding food, another set grows to replace it and when the last set is gone, elephants can no longer chew and so die (at about 60)? I love data like that, sans dying elephants.


After viewing animals, learning facts, falling in love with an erstwhile British professor (my Achilles lust heel) who shared elephant info, and repeatedly losing my children, we came upon the Sabertooth Grill, where there was a steel band playing, food, drink, and this “sheetah”, who scared the hell out of my husband (blogsband? blubby? someone help me) when he reached for a wrap and she came alive to hand it to him.




I don’t know why I’m picking on The Rock so much today, other than he’s not here to defend himself and I’m sick of laundry and feisty. Also it makes me laugh when he is afraid of anything (like alligators. he’s super scared of alligators) because he is so “Rockish” in his mental and emotional constitution and nothing much fazes him, so when something does (like cruise ships. he doesn’t like cruise ships. too much water), it is funny.


So the zoo! Right.

If you’d like more normal recaps of the Elephant Odyssey experience, I’m sure one of these less weird ladies will have one up on their blogs.


Zoo Group


Bridget, Sondra (her recap is up!), Tonya (recap is live!), Sugar, Me, Mel, Charity (a PR pro).


Oh! And join me later as I provide a tutorial on how to act like a VIP at events like the above. Brief preview: Insist on being called “The Countess de San Diego Momma,” and when you forget your camera’s memory stick at home, wear it around your neck anyway and pretend to take pictures. Bonus tip: If a rumpled English professor arrives to speak about elephant conversation and stuff like that, listen intently and make kissy faces.


15 Responses to “This Post is Made With Real Poo”

  1. * TONYA * says:

    We also must take note at future events to remove our VIP tags so we are not the only dorks at an event still wearing them well into the evening, a sure giveaway that we are not pro’s at this :)

    Loved seeing you and meeting the fam. San Diego Pappa rocks. Afterall there are only so many men who will accept (and pretend to eat) copious amounts of cake off the ground fed to him by my son.

  2. stoneskin says:

    I’m stunned by the length of that first sentence, stunned into oblivion.

    I’m also slightly disturbed by thoughts of elephant poo.

    I’m also reminded of this

  3. Kizz says:

    I’m afraid of cruise ships, too! There’s all that water and they’re too big. It’s intimidating.

  4. It was wonderful. I actually have a picture of The Rock and Booger–I’ll send it to you.

  5. OMG I think that the poo frames have overtaken everything else at the party – lol.

    It was quite the night of all things goofballish. That includes talk of cougars & wooly manthers from my pre-pubescent 13 yo & riduculous BF. I think that the poo frames were just the icing on the elephant booty cake.

    And as a PR peep – I don’t review other events (so sorry Jenny et al @ SD ZOO).

    As to hubs – I think you should give him some AWESOMENESS virtual name that sums up all his fantasticness & his goofballness. How bout The Incredible Hunk/Hubs?


  6. g says:

    Poo-frames! Yikes. And that cheetah woman would scare me, too!

  7. she says:

    Does it smell? That’s all I wanna know.

  8. I’m dying to get my hands on some of that paper. It’s the hippie in me- we never fail to love things made of poop (I brought back moose turd earrings from Alaska for all my friends).

  9. Jennifer says:

    I love, love the San Diego Zoo. Every since I visited nothing else compares. It almost makes me sad to be at any other zoo for their lack of proper space for each animal.
    What a fun night. It really makes you wonder why animals were so ginormous back then and how they shrunk over time. Poo is becoming quite the in thing to have, lately. I wonder how far they’ll take it.

  10. The party was so much fun! I need to go back to actually see more of the exhibit rather than socialize, drink and stuff my face with elephant cake (not cake made of elephant, an elephant shaped cake).

  11. […] The exhibit is amazing and the party was so much fun! Read the event recaps at A Day in My Life, San Diego Momma and Happy Healthy Hip […]

  12. I have only been to the San Diego Zoo once, and it was years ago, but I loved it. Would love to go back and see this new exhibit. I would have to have you come along, though, to make it as hilarious and fun as this post was (as was the one just prior to this…pure perfection!)

    Also, I was thinking ‘blubby’ as I was reading this, so I was delighted to see it had crossed your mind, too, as I got further into your tale!

  13. Elephants at zoos
    Countess of stories well told
    Poo haiku for you

  14. Da Goddess says:

    I only make kissy faces for orangutan discussions.

  15. Kari C says:

    Ok, so this may not be exactly what you were asking for….but I found this somewhere and thought it was hilarious!!!

    Also, my son is stayin in the medical-hold building at Balboa and he can walk right across the stree to the zoo–and get in for free!!! And he claims he is bored…I need to get back out there and drag him to the zoo, just like the good ol days when he was younger, and smaller than me!!

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