• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • About
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • San Diego Momma
  • Nav Social Menu

    • Email
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Pinterest
    • Twitter
San Diego Momma

San Diego Momma

Sharing some humor, a bit of writing and way too much information

Home / Etcetera / You Can’t Always Get What You Want

You Can’t Always Get What You Want

Etcetera

Every morning now as I prepare her breakfast, Booger asks me for “sumting elf.” Not a species of fairfolk, no, rather, two-year-oldese for “something else.”
So when it comes to food, a play destination, or outfits, I’m a magician with a hat, hoping to pull a rabbit or flying gerbil from the depths in an attempt to amaze and mystify her.

 

Offering choices, long the bane of parents everywhere, has not been the right course of action. Nothing satisfies her and her tone grows insistent with each rabbit. “No. Sumting Elf.”

 

Me, (tap dancing and doing the splits): How about this? (profferring a cracker)

Booger: No. Sumting. Elf.

Me: This? (balancing a chocolate cake on my head)

Booger: (with long-suffering sigh) NO. SUM. TING. ELFFFF.

Me: (pretending to pull a poop from my butt): Howzabout this?

Booger: Mama! S-u-m-t-i-n-g E-l-f.

 

It’s not good for my ego. Anything I give her is turned down, and right about the time I’m completely defeated and ready to start cutting off bits of my flesh for her rabid and fickle palate, she’ll usually go back to the first thing I offered her. “Toast.”

 

Really? I’ll say. Toast? Not the cake, the cereal, the applesauce, the soy cheese, the latte?
Just toast?

 

So then she’ll eat her toast, innocently, as if she weren’t the two-year-old ball of contradictions that she is, and soon she’s ready to get dressed.

 

And as I hold up her yellow cellophane romper with spaghetti suspenders, I’m not at all surprised to hear, “Not that, mama, Sumting Elf.”

 

Ah, existential angst. Not even the two-year-olds are spared.

 

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook

June 27, 2008 · 10 Comments

Sure I’d love to see you again

Previous Post: « The Girls Are Back in Town
Next Post: It Never Quite Goes Away »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Comments

  1. Allie says

    June 27, 2008 at 12:05 pm

    i enjoyed this story :) it was really cute! i can’t wait for parenthood someday, and fun stories such as this. great blog!

    Reply
  2. Steph says

    June 27, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    But if you try, sometimes you might find you get what you need.

    Anyway, kids? Especially of the girly variety? Just want to have fun…wait, no. They just want to explore their options is all. They need to know that they’re getting the best elf. Or sumting.

    Reply
  3. Jenn @ Juggling Life says

    June 27, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    I think we should get “sumting elf” made an official part of the lexicon. It’s perfect.

    Reply
  4. Restless Housewife says

    June 27, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    That was so funny – I totally had visuals of a tap-dancing mom with a cane in the kitchen. That was great.

    Reply
  5. myra says

    June 27, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    i like to call on song lyrics for moments like this for my son. for this one, i would have either used the stones (and i see that steph already read my mind) or joe jackson (you can’t get what you want til you know what you want).

    Reply
  6. Melanie says

    June 27, 2008 at 3:20 pm

    Ah yes, the fickle nature of kids. My kid can zero in on the lamest toy in the aisle and not be dissuaded but when it comes to snack time? Mine is exactly like yours.

    Reply
  7. Cheri @ Blog This Mom! says

    June 27, 2008 at 4:26 pm

    God knew what he was doing giving Booger to a talented writer.

    Reply
  8. Next Door 2 My Ex says

    June 27, 2008 at 6:07 pm

    Oh So I am (was) not alone in that thing? somehow we all survive – or somehow THEY survive. I’m not sure which. Sigh

    Reply
  9. kate says

    June 28, 2008 at 8:47 am

    i love her exasperation with your complete ineptitude for proffering sumting elf. maybe she really does want to try a little bit of roasted drawf (elf) on toast?

    Reply
  10. Da Goddess says

    June 28, 2008 at 8:56 pm

    You need a box with “Sumting Elf” on the front, Cheerios inside. When she asks for it, give it to her.

    That’s just the cruel mommy in me pulling pranks on innocent children.

    Reply

Primary Sidebar

I love words. Every one, every time. (Except “moist.” That word can go.) …read more

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Sure. I’d love to see you again.

Categories

Archives

Blogroll

  • Blog This Mom
  • Da Goddess
  • Dirt and Noise
  • Discover San Diego
  • Foolery
  • Juggling Life
  • Mama Mary Show
  • Mel, A Dramatic Mommy
  • Mom Zombie
  • Mommy’s Martini
  • Motherhood is Not for Wimps
San Diego Momma

Footer

Archives

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Categories

sandiegomomma

sandiegomomma
Back in Lake Geneva after 36 years… Circumstance Back in Lake Geneva after 36 years…
Circumstances have changed since post-Prom-picnic-circa-1986-vibes…
#WhereIsBryanAdamsNow
Dorm drop! 🏫👩‍🏫🥲💕 Dorm drop!
🏫👩‍🏫🥲💕
💫Travel poster for Saturday wine tasting.💫 💫Travel poster for Saturday wine tasting.💫
Celebrating the new 16-year-old with a quick Santa Celebrating the new 16-year-old with a quick Santa Monica trip.
And now she knows she doesn’t want to live in LA….
#LifeLessons
It’s happening….. It’s happening…..
Barely tolerating me….. Barely tolerating me…..
Beach day with my “little” one while big sis e Beach day with my “little” one while big sis explores Cal Poly…
Life transitions. Beautiful but I haz the olds.
#NotAboutMe #Whhhhyyyyy
A rare Bubbie sighting. Spotted in the wild. #HeDo A rare Bubbie sighting. Spotted in the wild. #HeDoesntLikePictures
Sunset squad. Brought a picnic and drinks to Del M Sunset squad.
Brought a picnic and drinks to Del Mar and watched the waves and horizon. Not too crowded or cold - another good hang with the neighborhood gang! ❤️❤️
Imprinting 2021 holidays on my brain (and in my In Imprinting 2021 holidays on my brain (and in my Instagram) (and in my antibodies). It’s a COVID New Year’s Eve…
Husband and I down for the count(down).
BUT. We’re doing decent and it’s cozy up in here…
Winery times! Winery times!
Guys on couch watching football; girls in kitchen Guys on couch watching football; girls in kitchen talking about everything.
Smells like a Sunday neighbor night. ;)
Line dancing lessons… My two left feet did nothi Line dancing lessons…
My two left feet did nothing right - but they did it with gusto.
Looking for a new book to read! #BookClub Despite Looking for a new book to read! #BookClub Despite the seeming divine intervention from above, we weren’t struck with the “perfect” next book to put on our list…..
Post-white-water-rafting super exhaustion. (Oh my Post-white-water-rafting super exhaustion.
(Oh my gosh you guys…! No! I’m not a sports model! But I totally understand how you might think so.) 😜😜😜
I wanted my hair to do that. #NordicSisters I wanted my hair to do that.
#NordicSisters
Dad’s hats on the people who loved/knew/laughed/ Dad’s hats on the people who loved/knew/laughed/sang with him.
Miss you Dad. Hope we do your hats justice. Lord knows we’ll have fun in them, just like you did. 😇
Paso Robles! Wine tasting beauty. It’s stunning Paso Robles! Wine tasting beauty. It’s stunning here. And the landscape is nice too ;).
Found my brother’s old ad copy. Good fun-writing Found my brother’s old ad copy. Good fun-writing inspiration...
Just in case I wasn’t feeling ancient enough, th Just in case I wasn’t feeling ancient enough, the rainbow jumper and white bobby socks oughta do it. No but wait! There’s a bowl cut. Annnnnnnddd giant gold-rimmed specs.
#CentennialFashion
Load More... Follow on Instagram
  • About
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 · Hello Chicky

We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies.
Do not sell my personal information.
Cookie settingsACCEPT
Privacy & Cookies Policy

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.
Non-necessary
Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.
SAVE & ACCEPT