• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • About
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • San Diego Momma
  • Nav Social Menu

    • Email
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Pinterest
    • Twitter
San Diego Momma

San Diego Momma

Sharing some humor, a bit of writing and way too much information

Home / Etcetera / Taking for Granted

Taking for Granted

Etcetera

Last night I dreamt that my husband died. And clearly, painfully, I regretted not saying goodbye.

 

We’d ended the dream night with tense words and when I woke the next morning, he’d passed away. My mom came to the house to help with the kids. Thank God, because I was useless and mute, and couldn’t hold the pain.

 

I missed him something fierce and my harsh words from the night before rose up to bite me again and again.

 

Awful.

 

Truly.

 

My relief upon waking saturated me.

 

I knew I’d been given a gift.

 

Awareness.

 

A realization that perhaps I’ve made little things the big things and the big things too little.

 

Living perhaps a bit unconsciously.

 

Not paying attention.

 

Lost in black and white.

 

Last night, TECHNICOLOR!

 

Dreams do that, you know.

 

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook

April 15, 2008 · 6 Comments

Sure I’d love to see you again

Previous Post: « Butch
Next Post: Hammy Gallbladder or Fatty Liver? »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Comments

  1. Jenn @ Juggling Life says

    April 15, 2008 at 10:59 am

    My BFF’s husband has 3 to 6 weeks left to live. He’s 46; their kids are 18 and 13. I have never been sadder and at the same time so grateful.

    Reply
  2. Jamie says

    April 15, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    Wow. “Perhaps I’ve made little things the big things and the big things too little.” Whoosh.

    That’s something to go on the fridge, or the mirror, or just locked into my stubborn head.

    Reply
  3. Myra says

    April 15, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    isn’t that dream just the most amazing gift? it’s your do over. and this post just gave me mine. so thanks.

    Reply
  4. matteroffactmommy says

    April 15, 2008 at 5:27 pm

    um yeah okay. you just made me tear up. and how long was that post? jeezus.

    my husband often tells me “how much i’d miss him if he were gone…” and i’m like, yeah, whatever, stfu.

    BTW, i’ve had some bad dreams about something awful happening to my children, but never about anything awful happening to their father. and i think that’s a good thing… based on what i just read.

    and yes, let’s be more aware of what is really important in our day-to-day lives. the PEOPLE. not the minutae. (sp?)

    Reply
  5. Angela says

    April 16, 2008 at 2:45 pm

    These dreams are the worst. And the best.

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. San Diego Momma » Blog Archive » Me, Me, Me, Me, Me, Me ME! says:
    March 7, 2009 at 6:34 pm

    […] The One Where I Subconsciously Wonder Why My Husband Hasn’t Left Me Yet […]

    Reply

Primary Sidebar

I love words. Every one, every time. (Except “moist.” That word can go.) …read more

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Sure. I’d love to see you again.

Categories

Archives

Blogroll

  • Blog This Mom
  • Da Goddess
  • Dirt and Noise
  • Discover San Diego
  • Foolery
  • Juggling Life
  • Mama Mary Show
  • Mel, A Dramatic Mommy
  • Mom Zombie
  • Mommy’s Martini
  • Motherhood is Not for Wimps
San Diego Momma

Footer

Archives

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Categories

Christmas carols for dad... Through the nursing ho Christmas carols for dad...
Through the nursing home window...
❤️
Mama’s mid-century vibes and dad’s suit swagge Mama’s mid-century vibes and dad’s suit swagger...
Walked a 5K for Wounded Warriors last night and de Walked a 5K for Wounded Warriors last night and despite my phone being stolen right before this pic, I couldn’t deny there are still good things in the world like red sunsets. Even if thieves and bad people muck stuff up every now and again.
Well. One of us takes her time to carve things rig Well. One of us takes her time to carve things right....No. I don’t know what it is. (It was supposed to be Chucky but she carved the wrong parts.) (I still admire the attention to detail.)
#OneDayHH — 8:23PM — Felt like the right time #OneDayHH — 8:23PM —
Felt like the right time to try Schitt’s Creek again. I couldn’t get into it last I tried.
But non-football-watching wives of football watchers do as they must do. And they must do it alone.
#OneDayHH — 6PM — Early evening still life. #OneDayHH — 6PM — 
Early evening still life. 
Husband working/watching football.
Outdoor cushions sheltered from possible rain showers tonight.
Buddha watching over all.
#OneDayHH — 3:50PM — Pulled my old diary out y #OneDayHH — 3:50PM — Pulled my old diary out yesterday for a work something...
About to put it back and this earnestness catches my eye from adolescent Debbie...
😳
  • About
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2021 · Hello Chicky

We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies.
Do not sell my personal information.
Cookie settingsACCEPT
Privacy & Cookies Policy

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled

Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.

Non-necessary

Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.