Yeah, I know. Obvious much? If the dismembered female didn’t tip me off to the crazy, the overalls should have done the trick. Plus, the eyes. Maniacal right?   Man, looking at this picture now, I feel like the stupidest tool in the shed.   Anyway, I don’t want to post his name. I’d [...]

Part 1 Here. Part 2 Here. Part 3 Here. Part 4 Here.     “A man and a woman, they asked me what happened, surveyed the destroyed door, and wrote on their pads of paper. There wasn’t any sympathy, which I didn’t expect, but found curious. I hoped that this latest incident would put my [...]

Note: I’m unbelievably busy these days, and I apologize for not reading your blogs, responding to comments, answering questions, and just generally being incognito. I write/edit for a living, and have the most laughable backlog of work this month that it’s completely ridiculous. And the work just keeps coming. So while that’s good for my [...]

Word: Egg. Genre: Romantic Comedy. What? Write a movie synopsis. Or a pitch? Maybe a snippet of dialogue. Perhaps a story. And include an egg(s). Go.   The Rules: You must write your entry in 10 minutes. This encourages top-of-mind, primal thinking before the ego and judgmental brain kick in. Just set a timer, make [...]

I have awards to acknowledge! And I’m gonna! But meanwhile, thanks Ferd! And Eden! And Mama Rose! And Jennifer! And Dirt and Noise! Also, Memoirs of a Chaotic Mommy! And Cascia! In addition…Auds!   Thank you for thinking of me. Each of you are someone I’d hope to call “friend” in real life, and I’m [...]

I kicked off this morning with the persistent words “A Book, A Thought, A Candle,” blazing in my mind. And since I don’t often get omens or messages from above, I thought this is one I should heed. So I’m going to give my addled brain what it wants.   Let’s start with the book. [...]

It looked like a wolf had bounded across the road. I blinked and thought, “Mind’s playing tricks on me.” Everything looks like a wolf at 3AM. That hour’s reddish-black darkness had bewitched me, and I wobbled on the road for a bare instant, wondering if I should go back and check. Maybe it was a [...]

In just a few short hours, I’ll be watching my great loves, the BoDeans. And all I got to say about that is: I hope they don’t remember me. In years past, I’ve called their hotel rooms countless times, waited for them by the backstage door, stalked their band limo, infiltrated their dressing room trailer, [...]

Today Mommy Pie unwittingly reminded me that if I don’t get to Matter of Fact Mommy’s “10 Random Things” meme, Matter of Fact will kick my butt. Which she could totally do, as she is a soccer player and my butt closely resembles two (or six) overinflated soccer balls.   But I have a problem. [...]

So among my other stellar personality characteristics, two stand out: impatience and laziness.   And when I found myself facing my mother-in-law’s birthday yet again without a present or card in sight (don’t EVEN get me started on my husband’s lack of preparation), I panicked. Because last year, we didn’t get her anything and boy, [...]

The fantawonderful couple, Paul and the Cocktail Maven, recently proposed a PROMPTuesday idea, which caught my fancy, so I’m making it official here.   As they wrote:   William Carlos Williams’s poem “This is just to say…” is basically about people who know they are supposed to say I’m sorry and apologize — but skirt [...]

Saw Man on Wire and really enjoyed it. It’s like…let’s see…like a poem on wings buffeted by a dream. One man’s goal to tight rope walk between the Twin Towers in 1974 is chronicled with interviews and news footage. If you like to watch people live life fully and succulently, this is for you. The [...]

It may surprise you to know that I’m unmedicated.   I’ve flirted with the idea and the substances before, but it’s something I can’t embrace, for whatever reason. I even hate taking Advil or aspirin. If I have to take an antibiotic, I usually Google its side effects, freak myself out, and then either don’t [...]

Mind bereft. Soul uninspired. Situation tenuous.   Here’s something from 2003.   I tend to get very inspirational and New Agey when I drink. Everyone is so beautiful with lots of zippy color lights emanating from their auric beings.   Also? I can get a bit controlling, wanting to orchestrate my surroundings to my liking, [...]

Regular PROMPTuesdayer and my good friend, Kristine, just launched her blog! Check it out!

I’ve got nothing, absolutely nothing today. No ideas, no pending posts, no creativity, no-thing. I pure and simple cannot come up with a topic, or a rant, or a commiseration, a story, a lament, a dirge, a whine (my specialty), a joke, a ramble, NOTHING. NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING!   Like, did you ever see that [...]

Today’s PROMPTuesday is lifted from Naomi Epel’s The Observation Deck, and is sponsored by the dog days of summer, the lethargy unleashed after consuming three urns of buttered popcorn, and menstruation-induced anemia.   So, from the Observation Deck: Show, don’t tell! — a cardinal rule of writing — is another way of saying “be specific.” [...]

It’s funny how stories are passed. You hear a detail here, a detail there, and sometimes one aspect gets enlarged and becomes another story altogether. If you’ve heard a family story as a kid, often times the tale becomes just that: fireside folklore lacking even the faintest hint of truth.   Inspired by my post [...]

Today, I’m compelled to write more about Going Geico™ — because its roots run deep, and referring to it obsessively is the nature of the disease.   First of all, let me say, I’m no stranger to this affliction. I learned it well from my father, who pretends to know everything about everything. He’s the [...]

This blog saved my life.   Not in a suicide prevention way, well not really, although my creativity was dying a slow, self-induced death, but in a letting in the light kind of way.   For many, many years, I denied my creative urges. There was never enough time to take that adult ballet class [...]

  Because I am too busy poking my perfectly normal-sized poo down my toilet’s too-small poo hole with my white linen reed diffuser sticks, I’ve decided to hand this post over to Toots, who has a story to tell.   It’s called “Witch Boo!”   (And it starts in the middle, right where the action [...]

Dear Everyone,   You are all fabulous. You offer advice, bolster my confidence, provide support, say you’ll fly with me to New York to stall my inevitable nervous breakdown, AND play with me every Tuesday. I think you’re great. Also, those pants/Crocs/Underoos/chaps really bring out your eyes.   Thank you.   Love, Mrs. San Diego [...]

Neil Kramer’s “Great Interview Experiment” is sweeping the nation, and as a nationeer, I thought I should participate. So, to whit (most probably not used correctly or in proper context), I share the interview I conducted with Amelia Sprout, which I at first thought was the name of a Harry Potter character. (Is it?) Either [...]

I’d like to follow everyone I know on Twitter. But I can’t always find everyone I know. Because I’m pretty dense with bits and bytes. SO, if you Twitter, and I don’t follow you yet, and you are so inclined, and can I stop elongating this sentence now?, would you contact me with your Twitter [...]

The wonderful and very thorough Mary Beth interviewed me yesterday as part of Neil Kramer’s “Great Interview Experiment,” and the results are up here. Right here! Luckily, she didn’t ask if I knew She-Ra’s real name, because then I’d have to kill her.   Later this week, I will be continuing the Great Interview chain [...]

“Mommy? Do you love me?”   I cringe. Not because I hate the question, but because I hate she has to ask it.   I used to ask my mom the same thing, over and over again, every day, and I never received a satisfactory answer. Seems my daughter isn’t either.   I’d always thought [...]